The devil paid me a visit this week. He’d let himself in. (The devil never knocks.)
Hello, old friend, I said. Where’ve you been?
Texas mainly, but that’s none of your business. And by the way, I’m not your friend. I’m your benefactor. I gave you a gift and you’ve misused it.
How so?
You name your blog The Devil’s Gift and then write saccharine paeans to trees, dogs, geese, butterflies, poets, angels, marriage, old men, grandchildren, sunsets—love, love, and more sweet love! You’re nothing but another Pat Boone.
(That hurt.)
He stared at my Halloween bowl of Snickers.
Here, would you like one? I asked.
No! I don’t like sweets and I don’t like your blog. It’s time you earned my gift by scaring the bejesus out of people. Halloween is a good time to start. I don’t want to read about cute, giggly children on your porch. I don’t want to hear about Cinderella, Spider Man, Mulan, Scooby-Doo, or Baby Yoda.
I went to my keyboard. The devil followed. I typed.
Halloween. Night had fallen. A knock fell upon my door. I opened it.
In the glow of the porch light stood a witch, a goblin, a vampire, and Kenny G.
Come on, the devil grumbled. Those things don’t scare people anymore. You can do better than that.
I began again.
Halloween. Night had fallen. A knock fell upon my door. I opened it.
In the glow of the porch light stood the Statue of Liberty decapitated, Lady Justice handcuffed, a Black man with a rope around his neck, a barefooted woman with three children cringing behind her ragged skirt, a singed forest-fire fighter, an army vet with needle marks on his arms, an oil tycoon with million-dollar bills stuffed in his pocket, and a Proud Boy.
Nice. But you can do better.
Halloween. Night had fallen. A knock fell upon my door. I opened it.
In the glow of the porch light stood the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse along with Mitch McConnell, Jim Jordan, Ted Cruz, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and a blubbery man, naked except for a red tie and a MAGA hat.
The devil fled in terror.
Halloween. Night had fallen. A knock fell upon my door. I opened it.
In the glow of the porch light stood the Dalai Lama.
Namaste. Would you like a Snickers?
I’d love one.
_______________________
See Paula’s new photo (“Humbolt Redwoods”) on the home page. Posted October 31.
Delightful!!
Love this!!
What a gift – if the devil prompted your inspired horror – (all the more so because it’s truth based) – then I thank the source of your wordsmithing wisdom. Yes, thank you…I’d love a snickers with my bedeviled reality. Every sweet kindness helps on this journey!🙏🏼💓
Your blog zeroes in on what so many of us are feeling! I keep remembering my ancestors, the newspaper editors who lived in the Ohio borderlands during the Civil War but never gave up hope, despite the news of the day. Thanks, Randy, for the Halloween treat. 🎃👻😎
Elie Wiesel wrote, “God made man because he loves stories.” A story can capture our attention, imagination and heart. On this Halloween, this one certainly does; many thanks for this treat!
You have outdone yourself this time. I guess the devil made you do it.
Love it. You gave me a smile this Halloween. 🤗
Well done! I was halloween horrified….real life is scary. Namaste ❣️
A real Halloween treat. A well-told tale of what is really scary. Surely one of your most inspired writings. It’s crafted like a traditional folktale and gains real power from that. Thanks!
Thanks! A grownup’s Hallowe’en tale. And you are right – the Devil never knocks.
OMGOODNESS, love this! So spot on!
Best Halloween Story, ever! It means everything that, as one of our worst nightmares continues to manifest, the Devil’s horror, his tribe, do not get the last word, do not write the end of the story. Love, Peace, and Wisdom do. P.S. I knew that you and the Dalai Lama had to be Snickers fans!! Happy Halloween-may you all repel the goblins with your light!
I hope the devil visits you more often. That was so good! Delicious, actually, much better than Snickers.
You absolutely nailed it: real-life horror right at our door. But thank you for giving the Dali Lama the last word!