Last night I had the strangest dream. I was watching the presidential debate between the venerable president and his cantankerous challenger.
A month to go. Neck-and-neck. This debate could tip the race either way. One gaffe, one stumble, one stuttered word could make the difference.
Many earnest questions were asked. Many fatuous answers were given. And then came the question of presidential immunity.
How much immunity should a sitting president enjoy?
Absolute and complete immunity. No questions asked, the chippy challenger bellowed.
The president quietly asked his opponent if he really and truly believed that the president had complete and total immunity for any and all crimes committed while in office.
Absolutely. The president is immune even if he shoots someone in the middle of Fifth Avenue in broad daylight.
I don’t agree. No citizen is above the law. Ever. But because you’re never wrong, and because the Supreme Court seems to approve your every wish, I’ll happily go along with your opinion on this. Namely, while in office the president is immune from any and all crimes. Is that right?
Yes!
Okay. I get it.
Well, hooray for you! I thought a doddering codger like you couldn’t get his zi-zi-zi-zipper up. So I’m real glad you g-g-g-get this.
The president nodded, smiled, drew a gun, and shot his opponent dead.
The nation gasped.
The president shuffled off the stage, eyes ablaze. He hunted down Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, Tucker Carlson, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Jim Jordan. And, alas, by the end of the morrow, behold, they were no more.
The president addressed the nation from the Oval Office, sporting a red MAGA cap like a crown.
My fellow citizens, our long national nightmare is over. America is great again. Our land has been purified of poisonous blood.
You won’t need to choose between two old decrepit white men after all. In fact, you’ll never have to choose again. Democracy wins. I will rule over you as though my rule were of the people, by the people, and for the people. Fear not. I will protect you, all of you, so help me Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
And please, don’t call me king. You can call me Joe—Uncle Joe, if you’d like.
Good night. And may God bless the United States of Amnesia.
OOPS. Sorry. I meant America.
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I think you can guess what song is now stuck in my brain. Would that we could see a peaceful resolution to our current national calamity. Anyone have a magic wand?
Thank you; when you “bring it,” you bring it! Please send a copy of this to Three Supreme Court Justices who “get it” and one copy daily to the remaining Six. If the not-so-deep Six don’t “get it,” the rest of us are “deep sixed.” Wait… If the Six rule in favor of DT while Biden is in office… You said this was just a dream? Not for long.
I jest above with dark exaggeration, of course, but your brief message today says it all. Unthinkable in a “democracy” to consider, never mind to rule, on such a preposterous idea. This morning, the “Devil” has brought a gift that should be universally understood: Hell no, the American President is not immune from criminal prosecution.
Alas, True justice could look awfully stark! What a vivid imagining, and taken to it’s absurd extreme, shows how truly over the cliff all this has gone. Dreams, nightmares…all ways to attempt to make sense of these absurd times, situations, and potential future…like Orwell – thank you!
Damn, that was funny.
While there is dark humor in your “dream,” there is also what theologian Walter Wink calls”the myth of redemptive violence.” He writes, “There is a place for a sense of destiny as a nation. But it can be authentically pursued only if we separate ourselves from the legacy of the myth of redemptive violence and struggle to face the evil within ourselves.” While no “magic wand,” it is perhaps a starting point, one which takes courage, humility and honesty. At the same time, let us remember the candid words of Eckhart Tolle: “The last persons to be enlightened will be politicians.” If nothing else, “we the people”must speak up, speak out and vote!
So sad that our country has come to a point where such questions even need to be debated, let alone by the highest court in the land. Of course, they are trying to hide behind the designation of defining what constitutes “an official act” or the periphery of an official act. Excuse me, I thought we answered the question of, “How many angels can stand on the head of a pin?”
Amen! Stupidity has no end in this country!
Thanks!! Damn, I love the way you adjust our perspective to illuminate truth. Of course, presidential immunity is ridiculous. Anyone being above the law is an offense to democracy and the freedom of everyone else. I do not want my kids to think I shirked my responsibility to freedom and the common good. Thank you again for illuminating truth.
Nightmares are such a mix of fears, hopes, machinations, and imaginations. I am so old I actually remember when presidential debates were interesting, following the rules of debate. Each speaker has an opportunity to present constructive speeches and waits their turn to give rebuttal speeches.
Dang! that’s an awfully detailed and premeditated dream, Doc. Your opening also made me think of the old anti-war song. Wishful thinking or dreaming won’t change this authoritarian, White nationalist movement by giving them a martyr by whatever means. Get involved with your local Democratic Party grassroots organization and start electing school board members, and county commissioners, while working our way up the political food chain to the state legislature and beyond. The DNC isn’t going to sink down ballot money into WV. We’ve got a lot of ground to makeup. It’s past time to get started. Don’t forget, Hitler and the Nazis were elected. Fortunately, America went for FDR and not Charles Lindbergh, an early “America First” true believer.
Oh gosh Randy, it’s Monday afternoon and I am still feeling unsettled about your message on Sunday. I know about satire and usually enjoy it but somehow your words this week seemed very creepy. For me the remarks felt like we were stooping low when we should be moving higher, both in our thoughts and in our actions.
I love your weekly messages, this one just didn’t make it for me.